When a loved one is deceased, there are many ways to honor them—funeral services and wakes generally being some of the most common options. While both occasions follow the same concept to respectfully remember the deceased, it is important to know how etiquette differs when attending either. 



Many times, families will have both a wake and a funeral to honor the deceased to fully commemorate the loss. Often, wakes will be held the night before the funeral, allowing individuals to view the deceased and reflect quietly on his or her life. If the body is not physically present, wakes are also a time for family and friends to comfort one another. 

Depending on the circumstances and the cultural beliefs of the family, wakes may involve a wide range of traditions. For instance, it is not uncommon to have a light meal at a wake and discuss memories of the deceased. While still an atmosphere for grieving, many find wakes as a way to seek comfort and support from those they love. 

Funerals typically follow a structure in which all guests should be expected to sit and reflect upon the loss of the deceased. Clergy or community members will often lead funeral services, providing opportunities for friends and families to publicly speak about the life of the individual. 

While religious traditions will vary for each funeral, most services are followed by some type of burial or cremation. Additional ceremonies and rituals may be conducted at the gravesite. 

Behavior at a Wake 

Although wakes are typically more casual and light-hearted than a funeral, it is still important to maintain a respectful demeanor. Attendees should remember to dress tastefully and remember that the event is to honor the life of a loved one. Since each occasion can differ depending on family preferences, it is important to research ahead of time on what to expect at both the funeral and the wake. If not provided by the family, this information may be available through the serving funeral home.